Wow. What a long day. The evening went by fairly quickly because I came home and took a 2.5 hour nap, but the morning felt like it lasted all day. I got up and got myself downtown! I made it to church with only one wrong turn, and arrived only eight minutes after the "official start time" of the MPF conference sessions. But since we're in Ecuador... I was on time. (Gina, if you're reading this I know you disapprove. But these are obviously my kind of people!)
(The morning view during my monumental solo excursion to MPF.)
(Sweethearts Mika and Becca leading us in worship.)
I got a lot out of this morning's sessions. (I just got up to reference my notebook but realized I left it in the office at church. Along with my Bible. Boo.) Perhaps because it's the Christmas season, a lot of messages about Christ being formed in us are lining up and it is extremely timely for me. I feel like I've been waiting at this crossroads in my relationship with God for a while, a place where the next step of faith must be a step out into the calling that he has for my life. Whatever that is, exactly. But I've been instruction-less for a good amount of time. This fall semester taught me a lot about starting from ground zero (again), figuring out exactly what kind of woman I want to be, and beginning the gritty work of personal discipline that it will take to see fruit down the road. Oh how I have seen my God's faithfulness through the process. I am more secure, more focused, more willing, and more able than I have ever been before. I am so passionate and so excited about the ways I can see God conforming me to the image of his Son.
Of course, there are still so many opportunities for improvement that I haven't gotten a handle on at this point. One of those being my inconsistent devotional life and generally, prioritizing time with Jesus. I know there are endless avenues I have yet to travel to develop spiritual maturity in a multitude of areas. But let's be honest - there will always be a multitude of areas in which I need to progress and deepen in maturity as I keep walking with the Lord. I've been learning how to give myself grace by more intentionally accepting the grace that God himself is extending to me, and it has changed my world. But I can't shake this feeling that it's time to move.
Today during ministry time one of the speakers said he had a word for me. He said that there are a lot of doors in front of me currently, and that God will lead me through the right one. It might be more of a process, but when he does it will open up a lot for me in terms of the calling that he has set before me and the person that he wants me to grow into. As this was not exactly connected to my prayer request and therefore not something I was expecting to hear, it makes me more inclined to believe that this was something God wanted me to grab hold of. It was an immediate reassurance to my heart in terms of increased confidence that God does, in fact, have a "right door" prepared for me. Lately while I've been seeking direction and pleading for specific guidance, I've been feeling like trying to grasp God's will for my life is a little like standing in the middle of the Amazon river and trying to snatch up a slippery little goldfish with my bare hands. (Take that with a grain of salt. I was a little overwhelmed in the moment that the illustration surfaced in my brain.) I am grateful for the reminder that my God is infinite and sovereign, and still intimately concerned with the path of my life. But I can't lie, I'm also a little frustrated by that news because I don't have a timeline for it. I don't know how much longer I will be in the so-called "darkroom" before I am led to move forward, further into the purpose for which I'm being prepared. I don't know when I'll have answers. But I know that my God is for me, so...
"Tuyo soy hasta el final"
Okay so that part of the post ended up being a lot longer and a lot more in-depth than I planned. I still don't think I've finished processing it. But there are some of my thoughts for the day. Some. As a makeshift wrap-up, here are the rest of my pictures:
(Bobby being "one proud papa" after Javi's message, "Unity in Adversity.")
(Nino, Javi, and I walked FOREVER this afternoon. Also, candids are my favorite thing.)
(This little friend followed for a long time after we finished lunch. We debated on what to call him, and my favorite name was "Tofu" since we had just left the Asian vegetarian restaurant. I don't know exactly what I ate there, but there were noodles in some kind of soy sauce with a fried egg in there as well and it was SO good.)
(Finalmente, I got to catch up with Chad tonight! He made mac n cheese and I sat on the floor and ate chips. It was a good time. If something is funny, who cares if the pictures are blurry?)
PSA: MY DAD TURNED 50 TODAY! Also, I got lost on the way home! I have learned my lesson and am no longer fearful of the bus system. The end.
Buenas noches. Dios te bendiga.
Mucho amor de Cuenca <3
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